Threes and Success

It is easy to think that success is all about fame, wealth, or power, but not all threes fit under this category of success. Threes are not just wealthy businessmen or famous celebrities or the CEO of some big company. Success is subjective. Everyone has their own definition of success. Threes are not just climbing the corporate ladder. Threes stretch across a wide array of many different kinds of jobs and have all sorts of goals they want to achieve. Threes can have any job and be successful at it. Just because threes want to be successful, doesn’t mean every three wants to be rich, or famous, or somebody’s boss.

Every three has their own, unique view of success. I talked with many threes about their definition of success and here are some of their responses.

What is your view of success in general?

Allana: My view of success is being the best at something I love. If I can be known as the best or the go-to person in an area that I love then I feel like I’ve made something of myself. I work in social media and wedding planning, and I’m known as a hard worker anyone can call on to get the job done, and I don’t take that lightly.

Katie: I’m a new librarian. My view of success is reaching a point in my career where I’m best positioned to help students. I’m really passionate about higher education, and once I’m a part of it and in a place where I can make change, I would consider that success.

Kastiney: My view of success is seeing a problem or an opportunity, making a plan to accomplish it, and putting action to it.

It can be making sure my kids get school done, getting myself food before 12, making sure I set time aside for my husband and I, helping a friend through something, it can be anything really.

Alyssa: My view of success is exceeding expectations. At work it looks like meeting and exceeding my goals, but it also looks like relational connection (3w2 here!) I love when people feel valued by and connected to me. I love the feeling of teamwork and everyone working towards something so much bigger than our individual efforts. I work in full time ministry, so seeing people experience the love of God through our efforts, or be connected to transforming community is absolutely how I view success.

What are your personal goals of success?


- Being faithful and intentional with all my relationships, interests, and most importantly- SELF.

- Not losing myself in whatever success I might obtain.

- Enjoying the present rather than getting lost in the future possibilities

- Being as authentic as possible.

- Encourage others. Always.

- Be honest.

- My definition of success might not be someone else’s definition of success, and vice versa, but——   so, STOP COMPARING

Katie: I just want a position that fulfills my desire to help students and faculty. This isn’t really a flashy career because most people misunderstand what it even means to be a librarian or what that looks like—I end up fighting a lot of negative stereotypes all the time.

Carole: Ultimately, I want to be healthy. I want to be financially, physically, emotionally and spiritually healthy. I want to do art full time and I want to inspire people to be EXACTLY and unapologetically themselves.

Alyssa: Personal goals: live a healthy lifestyle, have a centering morning routine (time with Jesus, coffee, connect with hubs, walk with the dog, get ready at a sustainable pace (not rushing).

Live debt free

Manage an income property

Use my gifts everyday to show people love and live out the gospel (teaching, leadership, encouragement)

Would love to be the boss lady and lead the whole thing. Just put me in charge! Ha! So I do have that in me. But it has to be relational and meaningful

Threes are often referred to as great networkers. Do you view yourself as being a networker?

Brooklyn: I would say others would totally call me that. I would never claim that label because I feel like that removes the connection of intimacy with people. I would classify myself as a connector. Networking seems ‘all-business’. I’m a bit of an anomaly as a 3w4 because I would rather connect with others than use them as a business transaction but, I think that’s definitely taken time and growth over the years.

Allana: Not in the traditional sense! I’m a little more introverted than most 3’s (it’s my wing 4 showing), but I know how to play my cards. A humble approach, saying thank you, and a prompt follow up go a long way.

Katie: I wouldn’t view myself as a great networker, although I do love talking and getting to know people. Getting past that first awkward hurdle of greeting a stranger is very difficult for me though.

Kastiney: I do feel like I’m a good networker. Mainly because I can read people and their “bend/demeanor” and adjust to help them feel comfortable. Once I think they are comfortable I will move along and help them find someone to connect with that shares similar interest. Connecting people. :)

Alyssa: I used to be more shy, but I have an outreach position in my work. I am the queen networker. I find great satisfaction in getting to know other people. Especially because I know they are working everyday with clients who need what we can offer. Though I wish I was more regimented in my organization of my contacts. I may look like I have it all together, until you see my car/desk/purse... and then The illusion is over. I can find what I need, but if anything ever happened to me, my team would struggle to make heads or tails of what the where(?) for a time. And I’m not super proud of that. I also encounter people only wanting to work with me, or comparing my colleagues to me as if they are not as good. Still figuring out how to be the best I can be and also champion others just as much.

Any extra information you might want to add regarding this stereotype or anything else you want everyone to know about threes?

Brooklyn: I would just say that success for most 3’s is a work in progress, and progress isn’t always pretty. Give us some grace. We might still be unsure about what success looks like to us but, remind us that the true success is finding ourselves worthy of love for just being ourselves.

Katie: Not all 3s are materialistic. I’m not super into my “image”, other than appearing to be a competent and hardworking person.

Kastiney: People think success is just in business. For a 3 the biggest thing you could do for our hearts is encourage us to remember that success can be seemingly unimportant things, but necessary every day life things. We can be successful in so much more than business and corporate and those places matter to us just as much, if not more, and we like to be acknowledged for it.

Carole: I think 3s really do want to be themselves. I think we want for you to like whatever that means. And the "deception" issue is mostly the fear and assumption that we are inherently unlikable unless we MAKE ourselves likable. Grace is very offensive to me sometimes. Sometimes, God tells me He's proud of me and that I did a good job even if I don’t think I did anything worth it. I get frustrated because I want to know what I did so I can continue doing it. I don't want success for the sake of success. Success isn't my goal. Love is my goal. Success appears to be the means to the end. Life is me learning that that is not true.

Written by: Camille Jett of @3ish_andiknowit


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